'Acorn-y' Joke Page

 The following are accounts of actual exchanges between airline pilots and control towers around the world:

Airport Humour No 1:

"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees."

"Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"

"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"

Airport Humour No 2:

A DC10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long rollout after touching down. San Jose Tower noted:

"American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101, make a left at the lights and return to the airport."

Airport Humour No 3:

One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC8 landed. The DC8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC8 crew got on the radio and said,

"What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?"

The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by came back with a real zinger:

"I made it out of DC8 parts. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one."